Tipping at Restaurants

Hey There,

For those of you that don't know, I work 2 jobs. By day I am a senior technical writer at a manufacturing firm. By night I am a server at a swanky supper club.

At my day job, I am basically in an office by myself doing extremely boring work. Not much to talk about there.

At my night job, I come in contact with some fascinating people. While I am serving their cocktails and dinner, I have overhead some strange conversations, witnessed some very strange activity and on occasion been subjected to some people that really should never be let out alone!

Last Saturday one of my fellow servers was blessed with one of those people.

She had presented the final bill to one of her tables and the man complained about the price of the 2 drinks he ordered. The server explained that he had ordered a top shelf whiskey and that we charge extra for the best.

He wasn't satisfied with that explanation. He said he knew how much we paid for that bottle of booze, he had just bought a bottle in the grocery store last week and it didn't cost THAT much to make a drink.

Anyway - he was mad when they finally paid the bill and left, exclaiming to all within ear shot that he "was never going to come back - we were ripping him off and he was going to tell all his friends not to come to this place EVER"!

Ya know, ....okay.....you get the occasional complaint....you expect that whenever you work in the service industry. There are times when no amount of pleasing will do.

But the final insult was when he handed the server his half-full glass of top shelf whiskey and the money for his bill and said this -

"Fine! I'm paying my bill. Oh, and you can finish my drink! Consider that your tip!"

- FITS - FITS - FITS - FITS - FITS - FITS - FITS - FITS - FITS - FITS - FITS -

If you can't tell by now, this is one of those things that really gives me the FITS!!!!!!!

Since when is the server in a restaurant responsible for the pricing of the food and drink sold?

This girl was basically told by this customer that because she works in a place that charges too much for their liquor, he was not going to tip her for the serving job she completed.

AAAArrrrgggghhhhhhh!!!!!

So I will follow by making a few points here:

• Your server does not control the pricing of anything in the restaurant. So therefore, ask to see the manager if you have a problem with pricing!
• DO NOT ask your server to give you anything for free. She does not own the place and cannot give permission for anything like that.
• Your server does not control the taste of the food that comes out of the kitchen. The only thing she controls is that your order is correct and delivered in a timely manner.
• Your server is working for LESS than minimum wage because she earns tips. Not leaving a tip is actually taking away part of her paycheck.
• Your server pays taxes on the tips that you leave. In most cases those taxes are actually taken out of her hourly wage before she even gets her paycheck. When you get paid $4 per hour at 20 hours per week that means your paycheck will be $80 gross. Take out the usual taxes and on top of that take out taxes on the tips earned that week. It has been my personal experience that most paychecks amount to $10 if you're lucky.
• Your server does not get to keep all of the tip that you leave, but she still has to pay taxes on the entire tip. So when you leave a 15% tip, up to 3% of that tip must be given to other employees such as the hostess, the bus people and the bartenders.
• Basically what I am trying to say is DON'T punish the server for something beyond her control.

People who do not tip or who leave substandard tips when eating at a sit down restaurant should stay home and eat. The standard tip in the MidWest is 15%.

The only time a server's tip should be penalized is when you actually receive substandard service.

So.......how do you tip? Are you a cheapskate? Do you find any excuse to scam your server out of her tip? Or are you a good tipper? Do you always leave above average if your service is good?

Let me know - I'd be interested in hearing.

A Man's Pockets

I was standing in line at my local convenience store this morning waiting to pay for my breakfast pizza. The older gentleman in front of me was paying for his coffee, when he reached into his pocket to get some change.

Now, this action in and of itself is nothing unusual, but what he pulled out of his pocket made me giggle.

A kernel of corn fell on the counter.

And that one simple item from that man's pocket told me right away that he was a farmer. Remember, I live in Iowa, where corn is plentiful and the land around me is planted with corn - so finding a kernel of corn in your pocket if you live in Iowa is not a strange thing.

But it got me to thinking.

You can tell alot about a man by the contents of his pockets.

As all women know, a man's pockets can contain the strangest things, and most of them will end up in the washing machine.

Is that man a golfer? I'll bet you'll find a tee or two and a divot fixer in his pockets.
Is that man a mechanic? I'll bet you'll find a washer or nut and bolt in his pockets.
Is that man a construction worker? You just might find some nails.

Anyway, when I got to work I conducted a little experiment among my male coworkers. I asked several of the men I work with to empty their pockets for me, so I could see just what kind of man they were.

Let's see- (Real names have been changed to protect the guilty!).

Bob, the computer draftsman, had the following items in his pockets:

• a memory stick for his computer
• a small flossing pick
• coins
• Lifesaver peppermint candy
• car keys
• chap stick
• a small pocket knife

That's a lot of stuff for one pocket. You can tell that Bob knows a bit about computers because only computer geeks carry memory sticks in their pockets. He also likes to keep his breath fresh by regular flossing and the occasional breath mint, and he may possibly need to cut something.

Keith, a project manager, had very few items:

• coins
• paper money held in a money clip
• BUT, the money clip also folded out into a pocket knife

You can tell that Keith doesn't like much in his pockets, which means he likes things neat and orderly OR he just plain doesn't like the extra weight. But at least he can afford lunch. Notice that he also may need to cut something.

Paul had the following things in his pocket:

• coins
• 2 phones - 1 for work and 1 personal
• keys
• breath strips

You could tell by the phones that Paul needs to be available for whoever thinks he's important. Paul also likes his breath fresh but doesn't seem to need to cut anything. When I asked him why he didn't carry a pcket knife he said he used to carry nail clippers which he used to cut his nails, but he stopped carrying them when he got obsessive about cutting his nails all the time!

And last but not least there is Jeremy - a cost analyst.

• coins
• keys on a key chain
• no pocket knife

You can't tell much about Jeremy by the things he keeps in his pocket. He says he keeps most of his stuff in his car (including a pocket knife) because he doesn't like stuff in his pockets. But there was one item that told a story. The key chain he had his keys on was a small baseball mitt given to him by his son. As you might guess, he is a huge sports fan. He coaches at the high school and middle school levels and is very involved with our local sports teams. And I guess he only cuts things when he's driving.

By the end of the day I had looked in 25 pockets.

I found signs of their work.

I found signs of their personalities.

I found items that let me know they were carpenters, plumbers or office personnel. I found items that told of likes and dislikes.

I was most surprised to find a common theme among the items most men carry in their pockets - coins. paper money, keys, etc. but the most remarkable thing to me was that most men carry a pocket knife.

Remarkable why?

Because most women DON'T carry pocket knives in their purses.

I'm A Yard Art Junkie

Driving home last night, I realized that I look at people's yards. Now I'm not talking about glancing at a yard while driving by, but really checking them out.

I find myself looking at the flowers planted, looking at yard decorations, looking at landscaping techniques, looking at how the lawn is mowed, whether there are water fountains or statuary, seeing if they have an American Flag on display. Stuff like that.

Well, there's one yard in my neighborhood that I really enjoy looking at. Every time I pass this yard, I am impressed by how well taken care of everything is. I know how much time it takes to keep a yard in that kind of shape and I am envious.

I said to my son, "I don't know what it is about that yard, but I really like it."
My son replied, "Yeah right, Mom, like you don't know."
I looked at him and said, "What do you mean?"
He said, " You know hwy you like that yard so much."
"I do?"
(Followed by a snort and a roll of the eyes) "Yeah!"

At this point I drove around the block and pulled to the curb, staring at the house and its' beautiful yard as if I hadn't seen it before.

"Okay, tell me then, cuz I'm not getting it."
My son points to the side yard and says, "See it?"
I look....look harder....."See what?"
"The EyCatcher, Mom."
"Where?"
"Hanging from the shepherd's hook. See it? That's the reason you love this yard so much."

And sure enough, there in the side yard that faced the street, hanging in the middle of a heart-shaped shepherd's hook, hung a beautiful EyCatcher Starburst Wind Spinner.

I love yard decorations, but my favorite of them all are wind spinners. Those beautiful works of art that you hang from tree branches, shepherd's hooks or eaves and spin in the slightest breeze are my absolute favorites.

In fact, I love them so much I started selling them at fairs and festivals a couple of years ago. I enjoy seeing the happy looks on people's faces, hearing their giggles and oooohhhss and aaaahhhss when they see my EyCatcher Wind Spinners for the first time.

My son knew before I did, that when I am looking at all these yards, checking them out, I am looking to see if it contains an EyCatcher Wind Spinner. And if it does I wonder if I was the lucky person that sold it to them.

When Others Diet

Okay, I'm not here to do any diet bashing, cuz I have certainly done my fair share of dieting and obsessing over my weight. But now that I am in my late 40's, I just don't care to impress my mirror anymore.

I've done the "protein diet", heard about the "points diet", had friends who did the Slim Fast diet and know a little about all the diets that are out there to help people lose weight.

But I've noticed, that no matter what diet they are on, there is a common thread to every diet and the people who are on them.

Have you ever noticed that when someone starts a new diet, they have to announce it to the rest of the world in some way? Whether it's an out and out HEY, I'M ON A DIET or a subtle way of sliding it into the conversation, it still comes up. Have you ever noticed somebody lose a lot of weight and THEN announce they are dieting?? Of course not. It's human nature to want people to know what we are doing, so we feel we are getting the support of those who know us!!

Anyway, I was in a meeting this morning, and it became obvious in minutes that the boss has been on a diet.

Successfully I might add. He's lost about 25 pounds and he's looking great! He's doing the "points" thing. You know, every food has a point and you get a certain number of points per day....yada...yada...yada.

So, he plops a big box of Krispy Kreme donuts in the middle of the conference table and says, "Here, have a point or two or three." Naturally, the rest of us dig right in and while we have our mouths full of super sweet donuts, he's talking about how many points he gets a day on his diet, how many his wife gets, etc. Then he asked a question we all wanted to know the answer to, right?

If you are in Japan, eating strange food, how do you know how many points you are eating if you don't even know what you're eating?. Now this came up because he will be traveling to Japan soon. He mentioned sticky rice, eel, sushi, and other unidentifiable Japan treats I've never heard of.

And I thought---- give it up for the week you're there....stop counting points. You'll be stressing yourself out trying to figure out the food.

And really.......

What's the point in that?

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I Heard it Through the Grapevine

I have never been a joke teller. Mainly because I can never remember the whole joke and the punch line always comes out wrong.

So I just don't tell jokes.

But every once in awhile, I get an email that just totally cracks me up. You know the kind I'm talking about. You read it, bust out laughing, read it again and forward it to everyone you know, possibly even saving it so you can laugh again later.

I wish I knew who wrote the following tidbit, because I think it is hilarious. But I don't, so I can't give credit where credit is due. Too bad....I'd really like to meet this person.........................

So here's the joke:

I was in W**Mart buying a large bag of Purina for Lola and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.....Duh!!

I was feeling a bit crabby so on impulse, I told her no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital the last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in intensive care unit with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in both arms. Her eyes about bugged out of her head.

I went on and on with the bogus diet story and she was totally buying it. I told her that it was an easy, inexpensive diet and that the way it works is to load your pockets or purse with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The package said the food is nutrionally complete so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a tall guy behind her.

Horrified, she asked if something in the dog food had poisoned me and was that why I had ended up in the hospital.

I said no.......I'd been sitting in the street licking my butt when a car hit me.


I thought the tall guy was going to have to be carried out of the store.

I LOVE THIS JOKE - didn't you just get a visual???? Freakin hilarious!!!!!

Career Choices

Over the years I have purchased a new car for the guy who put braces on my kids. I have furnished my dentist's home. I installed a swimming pool at the home of our family doctor. I have remodeled the kitchen of my home repair guy and I have even paid for the college educations for two kids that belong to the Goodyear dealer down the road.

Not really.....but it sure seems that way.

It's always painfully clear at tax time, when I'm looking for deductions, exactly how much money is spent each year on daily living expenses like dental visits, orthodontist work on the kids, medical emergencies, home repairs and the big daddy of them all.....car repairs.

I keep telling my kids that they ought to get jobs that compliment each other so that they can save money throughout the course of their lives.

What does that mean exactly?

Well, I think my oldest daughter should become an orthodontist.
My middle daughter should become a dentist.
My youngest daughter should become a doctor.
My oldest son should become a plumber.
and my youngest son should become an auto mechanic.

That way they become indispensible to each other as they live out their lives. Of course, it's too late to do me any good, but they can trade services instead of having to fork out cold hard cash.

Gee, maybe I should have had one more kid who could have been an electrician!

A Woman's Poem

I came across this little tidbit in an email sent to me - I don't know who the author is - but I wanted to share it because it made me giggle. Which fits right in with my blog "Fits -n- Giggles".

A Woman's Poem

He didn't like the casserole

and he didn't like my cake.

He said my biscuits were too hard,

Not like his mother used to make.

I didn't perk the coffee right

He didn't like the stew,

I didn't mend his socks

the way his mother used to do.

I pondered for an answer

I was looking for a clue

Then I turned around and smacked him....

Like his mother used to do!

Short On Cash....???

Have you ever noticed, when you are especially short on cash, that all sorts of unidentified expenses crop up to make a shambles of your budget?

I find this one of life's most ironic things. I have been the chief financial planner in my home for many years and I am an expert budget maker. As a single mom, I have to watch my pennies and my budget is an important part of making it through the month. But even though I have every paycheck planned down to the dime, there is always SOMETHING that comes around to throw a wrench in my budget.

I am living proof that if you are broke today, you're going to be even more broke tomorrow, especially if you have kids!!

Does this sound familiar??

My son comes home from school and tells me about the "special" shoes the basketball team just HAS to have, everybody on the team is getting a pair, he doesn't want to be the only one not wearing any and the order is being placed tomorrow. So he needs $55.00.

Then my daughter reminds me that payment for yearbooks is due tomorrow as well. I have 3 kids in high school and heaven forbid we "share" a yearbook. 3 x $25.00 = $75.00

You go to feed the dog and discover he's out of food which translates into a trip to "that store" in which you can't possibly get out of "that store" without picking up shampoo, toilet paper or some other damn thing you forgot to buy during last weeks trip.......$45.00

and finally to cap off the evening....the washing machine starts making a screeching noise on the very first load!!!! Which by the way, even if it doesn't mean a new washer, it still means a repair bill.....take your pick..........$125.00 for repairs or $500.oo for a new washer.

Lets recap:

Shoes $ 55.00
Yearbooks $ 75.00
Dog Food $ 45.00
Washer Repair $125.00

Total?? $300.00 of unexpected expenses in just ONE DAY!!!!

Aarrgh....how is any reasonably sane person supposed to stay within the budget and handle these kinds of unexpected expenses?

That - my friends - is why I have 2 jobs and several home businesses.

Of course, as soon as the kids move out, I'll have more money than ever......!!

Ha Ha Ha Ha...........................